The University Of Milwaukee

Chapter 1

This story begins in lecture hall at a large midwestern university where I was sitting through the final segment of an interminable microbiology lecture. Rather than listening to the professor, my thoughts were drifting off to the coming weekend and what I might do for fun in addition to studying for finals. It was mid- December, the end of the first semester was fast approaching and the only off-campus places I had been in the last four months besides my apartment, the grocery store and the orthotists shop was the public library. As much as I wanted to, I just couldn't get myself to venture out socially wearing a Milwaukee Brace.

In July of that summer, I had undergone the first of two stages of instrumentation and fusion surgery to correct kyphosis and scoliosis; surgery which I should have had five years earlier when my doctors had advised me to have it done. I had worn a Milwaukee brace since the 5th grade to deal with curves that were originally misdiagnosed as idiopathic but were actually caused by a congenital defect. By the end of high school, it was clear that surgery would be inevitable but I stubbornly avoided it, largely because I was enjoying living a somewhat normal, brace-free life for the first time in a long while as an undergraduate student at a small liberal arts college in Wisconsin. I also had a horrible fear that if I went ahead with surgery, I'd end up in halo and I wanted no part of one of those devices.

By the end of my second year of college, the kyphotic curve had grown more painful and I'd decided that I didn't want a hunchback look for the rest of my life so I finally agreed to have a type of two-part Harrington procedure that would take care of the curves once and for all. Because post-surgical immobilization is essential with that type of instrumentation, the surgeon and I discussed various options including casting, bracing and halos. As hard as he tried, he could not change my mind on a halo so he agreed that a full body cast instead would suffice.

A week before the surgery, he called to offer me a cast alternative and said that a slightly modified Milwaukee might work in place of a cast provided I was committed to full-time wear. I reminded him that I had worn one type of Milwaukee or another longer than anyone in the world and that I thought I could readjust to life with my old brace. He explained that a standard Milwaukee brace like I'd worn in high school would not work because it permitted too much movement. That was why he had originally ruled out a Milwaukee or other CTLSO in favor of the cast for post-surgical support. He went on to explain that Milwaukee braces were originally designed for post-surgical use and that up until the very early 1970's when the throat mold was introduced, Milwaukee braces were very restrictive and hence very effective in limiting unwanted neck, back and head movement. Unfortunately, he added, they also led to dental deformities an weren't popular with kids who had to wear them for several years to prevent curves from worsening. According to the doctor, those factors led to development of newer designs like the throat mold brace I had worn for so many years. Suddenly thinking that I may have been hasty in agreeing that a return to brace wear sounded better than a cast, I asked him what he meant by a "slightly modified" brace? The surgeon said that they would simply replace the throat mold with a chin pad, use oversized occipital pads, add some stabilizing pads in front and back and fully extend the anterior and posterior bars of a brace. He assured me that even with the modifications, it would still be better than the plaster alternatives, but no where near as effective or comfortable as a halo.

Eventually I opted for the modified brace, had the surgery and everything went fine. I transferred to a large university in the same state to begin my junior year, thinking that I might blend in better amid 20,000 students rather than 2,000. As I said earlier, I really hadn't yet started to feel comfortable on campus and even though I'd made lots of casual friendships and had many invitations to join people for outings, I still felt much too self-conscious to venture out to a bar or really pursue some meaningful social opportunities, even though there were many great possibilities. So I found myself daydreaming about when and how I might actually accept a invitation to go out with classmates and maybe even get to know a couple of women in this class better. I simply had to get over the feeling that being the only person on campus wearing an incredibly restrictive and very conspicuous body brace would prevent me from developing a real relationship with someone.

Professor Lewis' discussion about the upcoming final the third week in December stirred me back to what I was supposed to be focusing on at the time. Although I hadn't noticed her when the lecture began one of the other juniors in the class, a very attractive and very nice woman named Amy, had taken a seat in the row ahead and to the left of my seat in the rear of the lecture hall. She must have been trying to get my attention for some time because as soon as she caught my eye, she passed me a note. I opened it and read, "after class I'd like to talk to you about joining a study group to prep for the final. You don't look very interested, however, falling asleep and all!" When I finished reading, I looked up and found her smiling slightly waiting for a reply. I gave her the best nod I could manage over the chin pad of my brace and pointed to the hallway as a meeting place. I had often talked with Amy about school related stuff and she always was pleasant, but never seemed entirely comfortable with me and she never laughed when I'd make a light-hearted comment about my brace to break the ice in a discussion. I'd always felt she found something about me interesting, however, because I often noticed her glancing my way and she was one of only a few people that usually sat behind me in the lecture hall. Needless to say, I was excited that she would consider inviting me to join a study group with her. Maybe this would provide my much-needed opportunity to break out of my shell and start interacting with people.

We met out in the hall after class and at her suggestion went to get a soda together. While we walked, she jokingly said that she'd seen lots of people fall asleep in Professor Lewis' class, but never had she caught me sleeping. I said that I often dozed off but that thanks to my brace, I didn't suffer the embarrassing "bobbing head syndrome" so it was hard to tell when I was sleeping. I said that I considered this one of the few advantages of wearing a body brace in college. To my great surprise, Amy laughed and began asking all the standard questions about why I was wearing it, did I have to sleep in it, wasn't it uncomfortable, was it hard to drive with, etc. We got our sodas and continued talking for a long time about the difference between kyphosis and scoliosis, braces and other treatment types, friends she knew in high school who'd worn a brace and how great it was that I was so willing to talk about it. She seemed genuinely surprised that I was willing to wear clothes that made it easy to see and said that if she had to wear something like this she would cover it up as much as she could.

I couldn't hide my excitement at having someone to talk openly and ask questions about my brace and I was surprised by how much she seemed to know about scoliosis and brace treatment. Amy seemed to be unusually interested in the details of the brace itself and the physical limitations it imposed on me; asking questions like why the brace I was wearing seemed to be so much more restrictive than the ones she remembered kids wearing in junior and senior high school. I explained the obvious differences in mine and the need for limiting movement after surgery. I told her that once the second stage of the surgery was complete that I'd be able to return to wearing a normal style Milwaukee which would be less restrictive and much less conspicuous. Eventually, we both needed to leave. She told me about the study group and hoped I'd join them next week. I thanked her sincerely for the great discussion said I would look for her in microbiology tomorrow. She turned to leave then stopped and asked if I would be sitting in the same spot in the lecture hall. Although I was happy she'd asked, I must have looked puzzled and didn't react right away. Amy laughed and said she planned to sit next to me and poke me every five minutes to keep me awake through the lengthy slide presentation Prof. Lewis had promised for tomorrow. I assured her I would come well rested and take my exact same seat near the back.

I was late for class the next day and cursed myself for missing the chance to thank Amy again for our talk. I took a fairly isolated seat near the back of the auditorium and began looking around for Amy. Not seeing her, I made an effort to focus on what Professor Lewis was saying. Part way into the lecture, he began his slide show and darkened the room. I noticed Amy come in at that time moving very slowly and quietly to avoid attention. She took a seat directly in front of me and sat down without saying hello which kind of surprised me. I was sure she'd seen me but I guessed she hadn't wanted to make any noise by saying something to avoid drawing attention to being so late. Immediately, I took notice of how different her appearance was today. While Amy normally dressed in typically sloppy collegiate style clothes, with oversized, loose flannel or denim shirts and jeans, today she was wearing a very attractive but bulky, heavy weight turtleneck sweater and a mid-length skirt. Instead of pulling her long dark hair back as she always did, it was fully combed out over her shoulders. She looked great from the back and I could only imagine her ample chest in that sweater. She must have had an interview or something that day I thought.

With her sitting right in front of me like that, I couldn't focus on the slide show and I was consumed with thinking that I should tap her on the shoulder and say hello. We were essentially alone near the back of the room so I began to try and reposition myself so that I could slide far enough forward to say something. Anyone who has ever worn a Milwaukee or other CTLSO knows how difficult it is to lean forward in a chair that slants back, so after several attempts I resigned myself to saying hello after class. While the professor droned on, Amy began to pull her long hair up off her shoulders and work it into a bunch at the back of her head, securing it with an elastic band. Since this was how she normally wore her hair, I didn't think anything of it, but I found myself studying her even more intently; something about the way her sweater fit up around her neck seemed odd. It was only after several more minutes of close scrutiny that I recognized the unmistakable tops of two Milwaukee Brace occipital pads protruding just above her turtleneck sweater. I was absolutely dumbstruck. The feelings and arousement I felt at that moment were like none before. Here, sitting 3 feet from me in a crowded college lecture hall was an incredibly attractive woman wearing a Milwaukee Brace (apparently for her and/or my enjoyment) and going to great lengths to make it known to me alone. I was in such an astounded state I didn't know what to say or do. After a few minutes, Amy pulled her sweater up higher around her neck so that none of the pads shown. Moving as far ahead as I could manage, I quickly whispered, "please don't cover it up, no one can see you back here." Amy hesitated for a moment, checking the professor and then responded by carefully rolling the heavily ribbed neck of the sweater down an inch or two in back to reveal the entire leather covered occipital pads supporting the back of her head, the round nut holding the neck ring together and the leather trimmed sides of the neck ring. Repositioning herself with some difficulty, Amy turned her waist and legs to the side of her seat and twisted her upper body and head as far around as she could within the brace in order to look back at my face out of the corner of her eye. She must have seen the reaction she was looking for because she proceeded to slowly and as inconspicuously as possible, roll down the front of her turtleneck, uncovering the rest of the neck ring sides, the large plastic throat mold and the very top of the anterior bar. Keeping one eye on my face, she then lightly grasped the front of the brace and ran her hand slowly and down its length, beginning just below the throat mold, continuing down between her breasts and stopping at her waist, outlining the inch-and-a-half wide anterior bar of her brace under her sweater as she went. The effect on me was devastating.

The professor began to signal that the end of the slide show was approaching and Amy quickly rolled her turtleneck sweater back into place, let her hair down and stood up to leave. She bent forward at the hips to collect her coat and pack and in so doing pulled the back of her sweater tight across the posterior bars, exposing a small gap between her skirt and the bottom of the sweater through which a portion of the plastic pelvic girdle was clearly visible. She threw her coat on and in the same motion turned her back to the professor so that we were finally looking each other squarely in the eyes. The feeling of wonderment and surprise I felt was certainly reflected in my face and I think she enjoyed it because she seemed exhilarated by what she had just accomplished. I started to stand and she motioned me back down, handing me another note before heading quietly down the row and out the door.

The note read:
Randy - I truly hope you enjoyed that half as much as I did and I hope that you're not totally turned off or find me to be a complete weirdo. I will explain all this as soon as we can get together, but right now I need to get out of here and get this off before someone sees me with it on. I am incredibly excited about future opportunities with you and I can't wait to learn more about you and that brace of yours. Please meet me in the deli line at the cafeteria 12:45 and let me try and explain.
AMY

My mind was ablaze with questions and I had to convince myself that the entire episode was not simply another daydream. After class I walked straight to the nearest door and stood outside in the 30 degree air for several minutes trying to reorder my thought process and calm the insatiable and indescribable sensation she'd left me with. I had a feeling that this sensation was going to dominate my life for some time.

TO BE CONTINUED