I don't know why I thought I had to lie about why I was wearing the brace but I stammered out something about curvature of the spine when I was a kid and that this was just a follow-up treatment to keep my spine straight. After I said it I was amazed that it sounded so good. "Oh gee, that's a bummer, I bet it's uncomfortable, how long will you have to wear it?" "Well, I don't really know, and to answer your other question yes, it is uncomfortable. Could you help me adjust my mirrors? I'm sorry, I don't know your name." I tried to smile through my nervousness. "Bill, but everyone calls me Billy, sure, get in and I'll do the adjusting." Well, we got the mirrors perfect and I told him that I was a little nervous about trying to drive this way, but I had to try because I just had to be independent. "Well, I'm not doing anything right now." Billy said, "Why don't you let me drive to a less congested area then we can switch places and you can try it. Ok?" That was really nice of him, and it was a relief that I could try it away from the busy streets around here. "Well sure!" I said. "That's really sweet of you Billy" And I got in the passenger side.
Billy turned out to be a really nice guy, we talked as he drove. I felt a little unusual because my style is to look at a person as we talked but of course I could only look straight ahead. After about ten miles we were into a fairly rural area and it was my turn to drive, Billy turned into the parking lot of a little diner. "Hey Holly, how about a sandwich in here first, I'm starving." How could I say no, after all, Billy was being so nice. "Well, ok, sure but I still really feel self conscious wearing this damned brace, but if it doesn't bother you, I won't let it bother me." "Great, come on, I'll make you relax." Billy said with a big smile that I could only imagine by the tone of his voice. Billy came around and helped me out like a gentleman and we entered the diner. Once again I felt a flush of embarrassment as we walked to a table at the back of the place. At least now I could look him in the eyes as we talked. I told Billy how conspicuous I felt and he just laughed and said "Look at it this way Holly, They can look at you all they want, you don't have to pay any attention to it, besides, if you saw someone wearing a brace like yours, what thoughts would go through your mind?" "Well I don't know, I guess I would feel compassion and maybe even a little curiosity as to what it would be like to have to wear a brace like that, and I would hope I never would have to." Billy just smiled at me and said "So what's the big deal?" He was right, and from that moment on, I lost all my nervousness about being in public with my brace. Billy really did make me relax about it. I was starting to really feel an affection for him. We spent about an hour there, most of it just talking.
I almost forgot why we were there, ah, that's it, I was going to try driving. "Ok Billy, I'll drive us home, if you're brave enough." We adjusted the driver's seat so that the back was straight up and I got in and checked the mirrors one more time, Billy got in and I started the engine. My first problem was backing out of the parking space, but I backed real slow and used the mirrors. All in all, driving back to our apartment building wasn't too bad, I was glad to have Billy with me though, and I was glad that I started out where there wasn't a lot of traffic and congestion. By the time we got into the city I was feeling more confident about driving. "You did fine Holly, just be real careful, and I don't think you'll have a problem."
"Well, thanks Billy, that was a big help, I think I'll go up to my place and get some rest, I feel really tired. It's a bummer trying to get used to this.....situation." Billy looked at me with a little sympathy and said, "I bet it is! Well I hope we won't be strangers any longer, maybe we can do something together sometime, ok?" I smiled and with a devilish look I said, "As long as it's not attending a tennis match!" Billy laughed and said goodbye and I went to my place.
I went in and looked at the clock, only 4:30! I was really starting to tire of this already. Not being able to move from the hips up was more irritating than I had thought it would be. The headband was bothering me, and I still had that itch under the chin part that I couldn't get to. I just have to keep thinking about the money, keep focused, I told myself. I just wanted to bend and twist, oh how luxurious that would feel. Oh well, I can wait 'till tomorrow morning. I decided to try to take a nap. It was kinda warm, so I took my top off and in the bedroom, stopped by the full length mirror. I took a long look at myself, I got the hand mirror so I could get a side and back view. "Hmmmm, quite a contraption" I said to myself. I actually felt kind of proud that I was putting myself through this. I put the pillow longwise on the bed and lay down so that the pillow supported my back. This caused my head to sort of be lower and that relieved some of the pressure on my chin. It took awhile, but I finally fell sound asleep, I didn't wake up until 7:45. You know how nice it is to stretch when you wake up? Well, needless to say, I couldn't, another bummer I thought.
It seemed at the beginning, I had a lot of ups and downs about this crazy thing, several times I came close to cutting those little beige tie straps and just ending the torture. That first night, I actually caught myself standing in front of the mirror with a pair of scissors at 2:30 in the morning but I thought how disappointed in myself I would be if I screwed up this chance. I did make it through that first night, I don't know how, just sheer willpower I guess. The next morning I was at Val's office at ten o'clock sharp, I couldn't wait to get this thing off and move my body! Val congratulated me on my first full day and showed me to the physical therapy room on the second floor. I met Annette there and she said "I bet you're ready to get that brace off huh?" I just looked at her with an expression that must have said "Are you kidding?" Let me tell you, it felt soooo good to stretch and twist and move my head up and down and side to side! We went through some exercises and I got to take a nice hot shower, it felt great. I had brought my makeup and brushes and a change of clothes, and I was feeling so much better....until it came time to put the brace back on for another twenty three hours. But I just told myself "Be brave Holly." It seemed like my hour out of the brace lasted only five minutes. Before I knew it, I was all trussed up again and on my way out to my car.
Well, to make a long story short, I made it the entire six weeks, and collected my bonus! I was so proud! I can't say it was easy though, especially at first. But as the days went by it got easier, and after a couple of weeks there were times when it seemed the brace was just a natural part of me. It's funny how you can adapt to almost anything. Billy and I have been dating too! We actually went on a three day getaway to his folks cabin, with Val's apporval of coarse, she said as long as it wasn't over three days and I didn't mind not having my brace off for that long, it would be ok with her.
Now that it's all over, I am back to trying to be an actress again. No luck so far, but I keep trying. You know, sometimes I miss wearing that brace. I sort of liked the extra attention I was getting. Now I'm just one in the crowd again. Val said something about calling me sometime again. They are working on a new design for some kind of leg braces and they will need someone to test them.
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